the song of summer.

i've yet to ever actually create a summer playlist - i usually leave that daunting task to my roommate, mary. i have realized i mention her quite a great deal. the point is, she has highbrow taste in music, and well, i have terrible gay taste in music.

my music choices can vary, and sometimes, i like the occassional indie band. but throw on some whitney houston (RIP) or george michael and i'm dancing shamelessly in the living room with some really inappropriate hip thrusting.

but, if you are one of many to create a playlist, i would like to bring your attention to the following song, which i have dubbed THE SONG OF SUMMER 2012.



that opening guitar hook. that dance beat. your body will start to dance without your permission. it's physically impossible to not dance to this. kinda like, how it's impossible for me to not squeal like a girl when i see a dog of any kind.

so when you play this, understand you'll be on the dance floor making a scene. throw it down, just let it happen.

now, hit repeat. over and over again. and now, put this on your playlist and thank me later.

and my celebrity crush is...

guys (and gals): i have a confession. a very true confession to make. my celebrity crush, and faux boyfriend, is and always will be jake gyllenhaal. i don't know why. i can't explain it. i love him.

i've seen every one of his films. he is probably the one celebrity, out of ALL OF THEM, that if i was so see him walking nonchalantly down the streets of NYC, i would lose my shit, then regain composure, then request a picture with him. i would probably, also, get really close to him in said picture. depending on the situation, i would try to make conversation. i would say i'm a huge fan - a true fan, not some sloozy girl fan who only wants to add a notch in her celebrity belt. i would then never wash my shirt again.

that sounds stalker-like. and probably creepy. but i think he is just awesome. like, he seems like a guy i could get a beer with. someone who i could hang out with - go for a run, play some tennis. we would be best friends. we would talk about girls. we would talk about guys. we would talk about that one time on the red carpet when so-and-so did that one thing, and we all laughed about it at the after-party. but it was a blind item the next day on page six. i mean, we all knew, but we weren't telling anyone.

so, i think he is the one person, the one person i don't even freaking know, who i would be devastated if he was to pass away (no morbidity intended). like, the way people cried over whitney houston, michael jackson, or sonny bono - i would be that person. tears streaming down my face like old yeller was just shot (spoiler alert). i don't know why either. we're not in the same social circle (yet), but on some level, i think - and this might be why celebrities are celebrities - we would be friends. he's accessible to everyone. funny, friendly, outgoing, calm.

anyway, he's also in this music video for this band called 'the shoes' playing a serial killer. weird, right? weird...and hot. even him being all mass murderer, crazy person wearing a fencing outfit doesn't make me not like him. it only furthers my view that he is amazing and when we grabbed coffee, he would tell me all the funny stories about shooting it - how the director farted or how they were taking shots after each take.

view the music video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pt9wnawn7xQ

we all have that one celebrity crush and this one is mine. forever. stay away, bitches. especially you lohan.

late mid-twenties crisis?

yes, it's true. i've been a 27 year-old boy/man/adult for 4 full days and i am already having a crisis. case in point, i've started throwing out all of my clothes. literally. i have 3 (small) bags filled with clothes. why? i know people throw out or donate their clothes all the time. but i love clothes. i love my clothes. but, now that i am 27, i want to start acting more like an adult. i say that all the time. but, i think once i start on my outward appearance, i will then start acting like a real adult.

essentially, i've been wanting to start having work outfits. mary can attest that i have a very lax wardrobe at the office, and while i love that, and relish in the days that i can wear a hoodie to the office, i also know that i need to start being more mature. so, i thought: why not have work outfits! novel idea, dear brian. i actually think that will be more beneficial to me as well, and i have even started looking at things not as "awwww, cute. must. have. now." but rather "well, can i wear this to work and does it fit into my professional wardrobe." maturity!

the feeling on that above paragraph is i have a lot of clothes. a lot of great clothes. i can talk about clothes for days. i love fashion. i find it so interesting. and sometimes, i don't have enough of it. but, digressing, i want to start minimizing my weekend clothes and focusing on my adult week clothes. besides, let's face it - when i am doing anything on the weekends, i'm in comfy lounge clothes until it's time to go out. and then, when i do go out, i'm in a v-neck and jeans or shorts. but i guess, i'm so scared to try being more adult because ... well, i don't know why. i don't mind dressing professional. but it has to be the RIGHT type of professional. it's a trying on, and tailoring situation.

i'm also worried i am falling behind in a lot of work things. everything seems to be coming at all directions, and while i love it and love learning, i can't help but wonder if i am not being allowed to learn more. what i mean, is i don't want to feel like just hands to the people i work with. i want to participate in more, and it's frustrating when you are not needed, but needed at the same time. it's just a literal cluster fuck. but, i still love what i do, and am excited for all the new things, regardless of my personal issues with things. that's not hindering me in the long run. it's just a mild hurdle. (mildly vague paragraph)

on a side note, nicki minaj's "super bass" is highly addictive. and i mean that. i've listened to it on repeat for a while. followed by jack's mannequin. so i mean, my musical taste is highly varied.

hurricane irene also came to party for my birthday. she was fun, and provided a great backdrop to a great birthday weekend. i'm glad she decided to calm down a little, and not steal all my thunder.

i'm also really sick, and can't seem to get better. i even had a nose bleed today at work and not just one, but both nostrils decided to erupt blood out of my nose. TMI? it was mildly traumatic. and because i am sick, i haven't been able to go to the gym and that's just getting ridiculous. must go soon.

i don't have anything to add to my crisis. but crap, i'm in my late twenties. let's remember though: botox is no longer a joke, but a possibility.

ah, spring. you've been hiding.

today was, in my near perfect opinion, the first gorgeous day of the year. and i say this because i was able to walk to the subway with a light jacket and not curse through my lack of having a heavier jacket. it was basically, goldilocks perfect.

you know those times, when you see the weather, and you think one particular jacket will do just fine. and you don't want to take the heavy jacket because you don't want to be the person in a parka for no real reason other than sheer misunderstanding of reading the weather. so, you take those first few morning steps into the open world and you suddenly realize you were completely and utterly foolish. and you are now wearing the wrong jacket, but don't want to go change because you are late/lazy/apathetic. not too light, not too heavy.

today, it was just right.

i even walked to the grocery store in a t-shirt. simply perfect.

so, let's welcome spring with open arms. yes, it's a fleeting day of bliss and such, but i think it's one we can look forward to. like, the anticipation of it all, for the things to come.

some things i am very excited for:

central park concerts!
each year, the new york philharmonic puts on a little show in central park, and everyone who wants to have a relaxing time goes. people bring picnic baskets and blankets and just enjoy themselves. i made my mom come one year, and even though she got lost (central park is not easy to navigate - even if one is a new yorker) and she loved it. if you do go, bring some wine, cheese (only brie, please), snacks, friends, and balloons to give people a point of reference.

movies at bryant park!
hbo sponsors this weekly event where you bring blankets and food and lounge in bryant park. the movies are usually oldies, but goodies and it's fun to just go chill in the night. i have never been to a drive-in movie theatre, and i imagine this is almost like it. plus, bryant park is right by my office so i hope to get prime viewing spots.

friends!
yes, with the warmer weather means less hibernation. which means, happy hours, drinks on various outdoor locations and clothes that do not cover 100% of the body. with summer, friends want to frolic more - and that's always a good thing.

central park!
sheep's meadow. the great lawn. laying out and tanning. need i say more? no.

tennis!
only one of my favorite sports (aside from college football and throwing back martini's) and it's on all the time.

the sun!
yes, the sun is around all. the. freaking. time. but, with summer sun means, summer tan. and we all know everyone looks better with some color. i've misplaced my tan recently and can only hope it comes back shortly.

color!
during the winter months, i go into my grey phase, where i wear a lot of grey sweaters. but i always seem to have a pop of color somewhere. anyway, with summer, i love wearing color and it makes me excited to see people in color too. it's like, in the wizard of oz, when they go from black and white to color (big deal back then. plus, her slippers were silver in the book, but they wanted to use red because they (they being the studio) wanted to utilize the new feature, technicolor) that's what spring and summer is to me. so vibrant and so much fun.

i've probably missed some. but i think you get the idea. summer is de-lovely in nyc and i can not wait to take off my shirt and rotate my body every 30 minutes until done.