Let me tell you

take me to paris...not.

2011-10-03T23:39:00.006-04:00

very few things make me absolutely envious. i mean that. i'm dramatic at times, and say things in a fashion that has a hint of truth to them, but not 100 percent accurate. it's like, when i say i hate someone - i don't really hate them. it's just my tolerance for that person is at an extreme low and really shouldn't be tried.

what am i envious of? every single person that dates jake gyllenhaal. i love him. he's my faux boyfriend. and, i mean, all i want to do his hug him, in a giant bear hug. the same type of hug i once gave mickey mouse when i was six. true story. there are others, but i don't know if that's fit to print.

what else you ask? oh, i'm ENVIOUS (capitalization: necessary) of my mom and brother for taking a trip to paris for two weeks, while i wasted away in nyc. now, before you lambast me for the before sentence, hear (read) this: i've never left the country. the furthest i have ever been is here, in nyc. well, technically, rhode island, but whatever. i was going to leave the country right after graduation, to visit ecuador with my best friend and his sister (side note: my mom is from ecuador) and that didn't happen. why? because i was moving to the greatest city in the world. so, i was never able to visit the motherland of my mom. and now, working, i don't have the luxury i once had. you know, working sucks sometimes.

if you know me, you might know i have always wanted to go to paris. ALWAYS. i mean, everyone wants to go to paris. but if you were to meet my brother and me, you would notice two things: 1) we are very different people. i see fashion, he sees car engines. i see the arts, and he thinks vin diesel deserves an oscar (my apologies to the academy for typing that sentence.) 2) desire and appreciation.

anyway, my mom told me she didn't ask me because i just started a new job (lie: i started my job about 8 months before she left. my brother started his job in june. do the math. but, i guess that's one of the perks of working at my mom's company?) and thought i wouldn't get vacation. minor truth, but i could have taken off just not the whole time. so, she left me here, in the usa all alone. sad face.

my brother and i share a series of giant fuck-ups. mine are minor in terms of his, but doesn't that buy me some sort of "take me to paris" card? no? am i being selfish? ridiculous? if you think so, then i don't want to hear it and we aren't friends.

what started this rage was this: my brother put the pictures on facebook which through me into a minor funk and i apologize to the oreo cookie container i demolished in my blind moment of decay. i was jealous he and my mom were able to experience those things. the eiffel tower. notre dame cathedral (FYI! my brother pronounced it like the school. incorrect. INCORRECT! SEE! IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME!) also, it then put me into a funk of who is going to visit that beautiful city with me? i can't ask my mom or brother - they would piss me off in some respect because they did it first. i need either travel virgins or friends who i love/like/tolerate. or jake gyllenhaal.

but what softened the blow: my mom sent me a little care package filled with goodies that i absolutely adore and love. the contents included:
-two scarves. before my mom left, i would send her weekly emails on one particular scarf i wanted. it was this gorgeous checkered scarf that i could find anywhere, but for some reason, i wanted it from paris. i didn't get the scarf. but, she found two awesome scarves that are exactly my taste and style and i wore one today.
-cookies. i love cookies. i love sweet things. i love cookies.
-a key chain. this is perfect for my myriad of keys i always lose at work.
-a shot glass. duh. i'm a prepster. we can never have enough shot glasses. in fact, we're always too short in shot glasses. truth.

but seriously, where is jake gyllenhaal?

late mid-twenties crisis?

2011-08-30T23:09:00.003-04:00

yes, it's true. i've been a 27 year-old boy/man/adult for 4 full days and i am already having a crisis. case in point, i've started throwing out all of my clothes. literally. i have 3 (small) bags filled with clothes. why? i know people throw out or donate their clothes all the time. but i love clothes. i love my clothes. but, now that i am 27, i want to start acting more like an adult. i say that all the time. but, i think once i start on my outward appearance, i will then start acting like a real adult.

essentially, i've been wanting to start having work outfits. mary can attest that i have a very lax wardrobe at the office, and while i love that, and relish in the days that i can wear a hoodie to the office, i also know that i need to start being more mature. so, i thought: why not have work outfits! novel idea, dear brian. i actually think that will be more beneficial to me as well, and i have even started looking at things not as "awwww, cute. must. have. now." but rather "well, can i wear this to work and does it fit into my professional wardrobe." maturity!

the feeling on that above paragraph is i have a lot of clothes. a lot of great clothes. i can talk about clothes for days. i love fashion. i find it so interesting. and sometimes, i don't have enough of it. but, digressing, i want to start minimizing my weekend clothes and focusing on my adult week clothes. besides, let's face it - when i am doing anything on the weekends, i'm in comfy lounge clothes until it's time to go out. and then, when i do go out, i'm in a v-neck and jeans or shorts. but i guess, i'm so scared to try being more adult because ... well, i don't know why. i don't mind dressing professional. but it has to be the RIGHT type of professional. it's a trying on, and tailoring situation.

i'm also worried i am falling behind in a lot of work things. everything seems to be coming at all directions, and while i love it and love learning, i can't help but wonder if i am not being allowed to learn more. what i mean, is i don't want to feel like just hands to the people i work with. i want to participate in more, and it's frustrating when you are not needed, but needed at the same time. it's just a literal cluster fuck. but, i still love what i do, and am excited for all the new things, regardless of my personal issues with things. that's not hindering me in the long run. it's just a mild hurdle. (mildly vague paragraph)

on a side note, nicki minaj's "super bass" is highly addictive. and i mean that. i've listened to it on repeat for a while. followed by jack's mannequin. so i mean, my musical taste is highly varied.

hurricane irene also came to party for my birthday. she was fun, and provided a great backdrop to a great birthday weekend. i'm glad she decided to calm down a little, and not steal all my thunder.

i'm also really sick, and can't seem to get better. i even had a nose bleed today at work and not just one, but both nostrils decided to erupt blood out of my nose. TMI? it was mildly traumatic. and because i am sick, i haven't been able to go to the gym and that's just getting ridiculous. must go soon.

i don't have anything to add to my crisis. but crap, i'm in my late twenties. let's remember though: botox is no longer a joke, but a possibility.

let's run away

2011-08-21T19:12:00.002-04:00

i'm coming back to the blogging world! how excited are you? probably more excited than you think you are. sometimes, it must be hard to contain yourself when you read my writing because it's just like angels typing.

i took a lovely vacation to cape cod with my friend leigh, and it's a lifestyle i could really get behind. basically, we were living a ralph lauren ad. cape cod house, golden retriever, reading on the patio - i almost didn't want to leave. it's also a really dynamic place to be/visit because of all the people and architecture.

i'm getting really bad ADD right now and am thinking about sleep and not writing coherently. so, forgive me.

ohhhhh, i'll do a quick movie review. the other day, in cape cod actually, i saw 'the help' based on the novel. now, the book as you are probably aware took the book club world by storm. told from three different perspectives with three different dialects going on. it's an engrossing novel to be honest, and a quick read. i think what i loved so much about the book - the complexity of some of the characters and the south in general - was lost in the movie. yes, the performances are excellent (i have a major crush on emma stone, and viola davis. i want to hug them.) and bryce dallas howard makes you hate her. but the movie i felt simplified a lot of things and made it more mainstream. well aware the book was a mainstream book, but i am saying they wanted to create a film that everyone would go see. so, conclusion: recommend.

continuing on a movie review, i saw "crazy, stupid, love" and that was good as well. little long, i could have used more ryan gosling shirtless, and i could have used a lot more marisa tomei. i love marisa tomei - she is JUST AMAZING. personally, while i loved her in dramatic roles like 'in the bedroom' she is just amazing as a comedic actress and undervalued/unrealized as to how funny she can be. i mean, she won an oscar for 'my cousin vinny' - it's very rare for a comedic role to win an oscar.

also, went to brunch the other day with loan, who went to college with me - she was in town on a little vacation. so, we had TWO celeb sightings. one was adrian grenier, from 'entourage' and alicia witt from 'friday night lights.' we were eating at the LPQ literally two doors down from our apartment. when both celebrities saw each other, they greeted each other and it was just surreal to see that. like, celebrities know other celebrities! i forget they have a small social circle. i also felt bad for adrian because some guy came up and asked for an autograph and you could tell he was annoyed.

also, congrats to my close friend kate for getting engaged!

til next time,
bri

thursday night.

2011-06-30T22:13:00.003-04:00

in case you forgot, it's summer time in the big apple. which, i guess also means, it's summer time everywhere else depending on the hemisphere you reside in. that being said, let's delve into my life.

ray, mary's puppy, and i have been bonding steadily since she arrived into our apartment. i also speak to her like a human, which goes way past her adorable little head. often, she will ignore me. when she decides i am worthy of her attention, she thinks i absolutely love it when she licks my face. my smelly boy socks are her weakness, as are people walking/sitting/sleeping/running/smoking/breathing. just call me the dog-father.

i've picked up golf. i know, me? but i love mental sports and sports that rely on myself. i'm not so much a team sport person because i don't want to rely on anyone else. i'd rather blame myself for something than other people. unless, we are talking about anything besides sports, then i'm ready to blame anyone and everyone. that's actually a lie. i will pretend it never happened.

in case you missed it, gay marriage passed in new york. my mom, she merely glazed over it which means she either doesn't want grandkids, doesn't want me to marry another man, or doesn't read/watch the news. anyway, i'm now able to marry and divorce like everyone else! this brought a huge wave of different emotions to my overwhelmed self, and it's actually really sad i wasn't so like, in tune with them. at first, i thought, "holy moly! i can marry" and then it quickly metamorphosed into "holy moly, i'm single, 26 and ... WHERE HAS MY LIFE GONE!?" clearly, that's quite the jump of emotions, but let me clarify: in texas, we are birthed, dressed, and finally married. it's a quick process. and, it's just a way of life. it's like, the hamptons for the new yorkers out here.

but, it's rather amazing to now have the option. and i think it's going to be beneficial and wonderful for those who are just now coming out. they will be living in a world, well state(s), that allow gay marriage and it will seem normal, like there was never a time when you weren't allowed to marry. instead, it will be a nice chapter (sidebar?) in some book and then we will all remember what it used to be like. for those of us who have known both, it's going to be an adjustment. now, i have to think about marriage and what it means when it comes to that time when i eventually find someone i want to marry. i've seen my parents who have stayed together forevvvvvveeeeeerrrrrrrrrrr and i know i want to have that. i'm jealous of that. but let's just be honest and say my wedding will be delicious and beautiful and it won't be gaudy or resemble anything from "sex and the city 2 - let's do everything wrong." i have many more stipulations, but not now.

and, i'm wearing shorts to work tomorrow. suck it.

a reflection. yikes.

2011-04-22T22:37:00.000-04:00

earlier this week, i was able to take in a show that just began previews "the normal heart" which is, in an easy and simple way to explain, a play about the beginning of the AIDS epidemic. it's much more than that, a political play about the frustration so many gay people had in the early stages of HIV/AIDS and those who tried to take a stand, and others who wanted to fight with grace.

it moved me. really. and not because i am gay. but it did a few things for me.

1) i have no idea who i am. and i say this because i don't know my history as a gay person. do i want to know? maybe. but i've always been the person to never let my homosexuality define who i am. honestly, i feel that me being gay is the least interesting thing about me. and i feel that i have been successful in that endeavor since i decided to come out. i have so many other qualities that make me who i am. with that, i've never demanded people respect me, and i've never yelled at anyone because my rights are not equal or attacked them for the same reason. i'm a lover, not a fighter! but in seriousness, MLK and Ghandi did this (i think. you see, i'm not very good at things like history and geography and things that require concentration) - you have to fight with rational thinking and calmness. if rome wasn't built in a day, equal rights won't happen with vicious words or swinging of fists.

so when i say i don't know who i am, i've never had to fight like people before me had to fight. i wonder if they will write about that in the history books - like women's rights or the civil rights movement. what will ours be called? the rainbow riots? the fairy war? oh, i could go on and on. but it would be an interesting read.

2) it made me realize how lucky i am. i am lucky to have a group of friends and family who completely love and trust me and accept me for who i am. no questions. i don't know if that is because we have come so far, or because we all found each other, but i am so fortunate to not worry about having a brother say to me "you aren't my equal" or parents who would rather assume i am "unwell." but as i type that, my parents probably assume i've already joined a cult and wear only black and do poetry slams on thursdays. which is a lie, since i do them on wednesdays.

story: i remember coming out to my roommate freshman year, like the day we moved in with each other - mind you, we also went to the same high school - and he is pretty conservative and he honestly didn't care. it didn't change who i was, and it didn't change the time we had. overall, it was one of the most rewarding experiences i could have had at such a young and impressionable age. so thanks college for showing me no one cares that i am gay. and thanks for putting me in the most annoyingly positioned dorm on the entire planet.

3) i belong to a group of people that are creators, artists, friends, brothers, sisters, thinkers and believers. these people have lived lives that we still talk about today - whole books have been devoted to these people - and they have changed how we do things, how we live and how we look forward. we are a group of many who have risen and have loved the world, even when we were not loved.

i say this because we can all do great things. and i say this because this above group can be said about anyone - it isn't based on sexuality.

side note, how ridiculous would it be to preface anything with "gay" or "straight" before it. ie: "this is my straight taxi cab driver." or "have you met my gay chef who makes the best cornbread in the world?" or, "this is my lesbian softball coach." ok, not the last one. there sexuality has nothing to do with how they actually perform their profession. but it does provide some individuals with a window of opportunity at 3am after a good poetry slam when they have a little background (background can come up organically in conversation, like "do you like girls or guys?")

so soak that in. soaking it in? good. now, throw some glitter in the air like you just don't care and get ready for a good time.

peace, love, and springtime,
bri bri

ah, spring. you've been hiding.

2011-04-11T23:04:00.003-04:00

today was, in my near perfect opinion, the first gorgeous day of the year. and i say this because i was able to walk to the subway with a light jacket and not curse through my lack of having a heavier jacket. it was basically, goldilocks perfect.

you know those times, when you see the weather, and you think one particular jacket will do just fine. and you don't want to take the heavy jacket because you don't want to be the person in a parka for no real reason other than sheer misunderstanding of reading the weather. so, you take those first few morning steps into the open world and you suddenly realize you were completely and utterly foolish. and you are now wearing the wrong jacket, but don't want to go change because you are late/lazy/apathetic. not too light, not too heavy.

today, it was just right.

i even walked to the grocery store in a t-shirt. simply perfect.

so, let's welcome spring with open arms. yes, it's a fleeting day of bliss and such, but i think it's one we can look forward to. like, the anticipation of it all, for the things to come.

some things i am very excited for:

central park concerts!
each year, the new york philharmonic puts on a little show in central park, and everyone who wants to have a relaxing time goes. people bring picnic baskets and blankets and just enjoy themselves. i made my mom come one year, and even though she got lost (central park is not easy to navigate - even if one is a new yorker) and she loved it. if you do go, bring some wine, cheese (only brie, please), snacks, friends, and balloons to give people a point of reference.

movies at bryant park!
hbo sponsors this weekly event where you bring blankets and food and lounge in bryant park. the movies are usually oldies, but goodies and it's fun to just go chill in the night. i have never been to a drive-in movie theatre, and i imagine this is almost like it. plus, bryant park is right by my office so i hope to get prime viewing spots.

friends!
yes, with the warmer weather means less hibernation. which means, happy hours, drinks on various outdoor locations and clothes that do not cover 100% of the body. with summer, friends want to frolic more - and that's always a good thing.

central park!
sheep's meadow. the great lawn. laying out and tanning. need i say more? no.

tennis!
only one of my favorite sports (aside from college football and throwing back martini's) and it's on all the time.

the sun!
yes, the sun is around all. the. freaking. time. but, with summer sun means, summer tan. and we all know everyone looks better with some color. i've misplaced my tan recently and can only hope it comes back shortly.

color!
during the winter months, i go into my grey phase, where i wear a lot of grey sweaters. but i always seem to have a pop of color somewhere. anyway, with summer, i love wearing color and it makes me excited to see people in color too. it's like, in the wizard of oz, when they go from black and white to color (big deal back then. plus, her slippers were silver in the book, but they wanted to use red because they (they being the studio) wanted to utilize the new feature, technicolor) that's what spring and summer is to me. so vibrant and so much fun.

i've probably missed some. but i think you get the idea. summer is de-lovely in nyc and i can not wait to take off my shirt and rotate my body every 30 minutes until done.

oh, julie.

2011-04-10T22:22:00.001-04:00

i figured i will write my blog like i feel right now - a little add.

i saw 'spider-man: turn off the dark' (version 1.0) on wednesday with my good friend leigh. if you want my review, please ask her because we share the same opinion on many things. and my review will be exactly like her review. it's almost like we share mindssssssssssssssssss.

my goal to start waking up early has not been a vital success. rather, i've been sleeping later and later. and therefore, going to bed later and later. this is a terrible, no good, very bad cycle of regression to my freshman year of college. and one that needs to stop. i say this, while i sit in my bed writing at 10pm on a sunday. here is hoping my early night will be an early morning. searz (as in, seriously). i need to get bikini body ready. and yes, i know i don't wear bikini's, but i do wear swim trunks and the gays can be harsh judgers.

oh, i saw an opera too this week! boy, so much culture, i should pinch myself. this time, i saw the opera, 'tosca' with laura, and we enjoyed a wonderful time. our seats were the bomb dot com. seriously. we sat in the orchestra, and were in row 'g' which is about 7 rows from the front. i actually had to count that on my fingers while singing the alphabet - thanks teachers! now, for those of you who know me, i love theatres. i have a huge affection for old theatres, including old movie houses, and for me to go to these fancy schmancy ones is just a plain joy for me. i find the architecture to be divine and so well crafted, and i often wish movie theatres were still treated with such care. instead of the whole cookie cutter idea we have going on now.

and as we finish up the weekend, i need to realize a couple things. one, i need to be more aware of how i say things and how it will possibly be perceived. honestly, and this is from a male perspective, i don't think we fully think things through. and me, i'm one to say things and just say them. i'm not a malicious person, and the things i say, while sound cruel or harsh or sassy or something that might be negative, are not actually meant to hurt. and yes, even though words hurt, i should be more aware of things and what i say. i guess, i have the mentality of just free thought, no filter. which is good and bad.

two, i need to go into yoga knowing full well my body will be mistreated and i will soak my shirt in sweat.

charming, i know.

xoxo. let's have happy days and happy weeks as we welcome the spring weather.

diet

2011-04-10T03:21:00.003-04:00

i'm writing this while it is still fresh in my mind. please, enjoy.

my roommate, mary, sent me a link the other day about 'gray's papaya', a local hot dog joint on our street. it's rather famous in nyc, and has been seen in a few scenes in movies and television shows. the one scene i remember right now is from 'sex and the city' where carrie is in the car after the release of her book, and her driver is like, "nah, girl. we're going to celebrate" and they get hot dogs at 'gray's'.

well, the new article says 'gray's' is now serving pizza. which, is like, news. anyway, i went and had it tonight. and it's not life changing. but it's dirt cheap. and i followed the pizza with cheetos.

i need a chef.

i'm in that awkward phase...

2011-03-25T18:14:00.008-04:00

my my my, i haven't written anything in a while. my bad. i should be better. i need to be better.

i'm slowly trying to have a complete overhaul of my life. nothing like, changing my personality (i'm already your sassy best friend! and almost perfect!) but more like, getting on an adult schedule. eating better. being a more productive member of society. those things.

sometimes, i think, "whoa, it's like i never graduated college." which needs some actual explanation. i don't party all the time, and i don't do stupid things (usually) and i don't skip work. but what i do do is stay up later than i should. eat more than i should. get the extra drink when i should stay home.

i'm trying to combat that stuff with growing up. but i guess, the real question is, when do we become - and i shudder when i say this - more like our parents. i mean this in the way that, my parents have their routine, and know what's going on and live very good lives. i feel though, my life is still sporadic and random, and i have no set schedule. i can't even get my laundry done at the same time. my mom can cook a meal with anything, and i have a meltdown the second i step into a grocery store.

when does that change for us? is it a family? kids? significant others? i can't tell you. i wish i could. but it escapes me. it's not that i am not driven, or anything. i just need to get a grip on life, hold on, and see what is going on.

don't let this come across as me becoming boring, or square. no. but what i want is the ability to get up at 7am and go to the gym. and the ability to cook meals that require some knowledge of using a stove. i want to get on the boat of responsibility and see what happens. that boat is rocking, and i'm not knocking on it and i don't have a life vest for life right now. i'm blindly trying to find my way. which, is common for people our age, i hope. it's scary to think, that even with my education and my upbringing and smarts, i don't know how to get steady again.

maybe, it's because i don't want to let friends down. and maybe it's because i don't want to miss something. there are so many 'maybe's' in this, i need to have a solid. i need that foundation because i think it's time that i understand the importance of being an adult.

now that i have typed all this, i wonder if this is what people call "responsibility." ugh.

the letter 'f'

2011-02-18T21:10:00.004-05:00

last night, i went to an event party with my former coworkers. bourbon was the drink of the evening, and that is what i drank. i've never drank bourbon before, and will never put that poison to my lips ever again. basically, i was body slammed and came home feeling like my 21st birthday, but worse. i'm being honest. i have no idea what happened. but, there is more to the story than my drinking.

living in new york, one gets to experience a lot of different people and lot of different cultures. this also gives people what i assume a very open mind, and the ability to be accepting. except, like always, i'm not (w)right, but rather wrong.

while i was enjoying the poison with my friends, a man came up and tried to talk to us. being with girls, i understood the appeal. so i humored the stranger for a short while and then moved my arm and body to signify we were done with the conversation. he starts getting irate and starts yelling at me about all sorts of things that were neither here nor there. i turn around and tell him "we're done here" and ask him to leave us alone. well, he didn't. he started yelling more and said the ultimate word "faggot." he said this many times in the course of a few sentences and i was beyond any emotion. i felt disgraced, humiliated, broken and ugly. the words were delivered with a sense of hate, and that's something you can't just get over.

you would think, being from texas, i would have encountered more words like this, with attitudes to match. but i never did. i had a great childhood and an even more perfect family and friends. never did i ever feel wrong. so, to be called a faggot in a bar in front of friends in a neighborhood that is known to be a gay area, was shocking and still hurtful.

words, as i am sure many of you know, hurt. i've never experienced the full extent of that phrase until now. it's humbling.

i'm a fun person, i like to believe. and i am pretty liberal in many things and to have that word thrown is jarring. while the sentences were flying and the words were being hurled, i was mildly frightened about where the upcoming actions might escalate. do i fight? well, i have never been in a fight and the guy was bigger in weight than me. and i didn't know if he was going to just punch me and that was it. i didn't know what was going to happen. but i knew i didn't feel safe. but i think this was the first time in this city i have never felt unsafe,

all things considering, it ended fine. the security people took him outside and he left. nothing much to say really. done and done. and even if there was something else to say, i couldn't tell you because shortly afterwards, the poison took hold of me and my body.

total eclipse of my heart

2011-02-14T21:48:00.004-05:00

today, the entire color palate of red threw up on the world. and i'm not one to hate on valentine's day just because i'm single right now. nope, i'm not one of those people who bemoans it and then goes all martha (as in stewart) on the holiday when they are with someone. but i do think it's an overrated holiday and just an annoying waste of red.

beside, if i want chocolate, i will buy myself chocolate. i don't need a man to buy that for me. same thing with flowers. and diamonds...well, i won't get to hasty. if he wants to buy me diamond, gggguuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrlllllllllllllll, it better be cartier, in a red box and big enough to make me throw off security when i walk through JFK. so, maybe there is a reason to get behind the color red.

i digress. on the subway today, everyone had roses and balloons and stuffed bears. it was exhausting to watch. even when i was dating M, and during our time together, valentine's day came and i think i told him something along the lines of this:

me: can't we just order pizza or something and watch a movie?

it's not that i am unromantic. and it's not because i didn't care about him (i did and still do, and we still talk!) i just didn't want to celebrate our relationship with everyone else watching and doing the same.

side note, for valentine's day, i bought M this mr. potato head doll from the disney store that looked like donald duck because that was his favourite character and it meant something to him. see, that was much better than flowers. plus, i played with him. the duck, not him. this isn't a romance blog.

anyway, i don't really need one exclusive day to be all lovey dovey. you feel me? plus, if you really do care, and can't decide what cartier item would look best on me, or what burberry trench i need, then surprise me with something on any other day of the year with something that is really thoughtful and all about me.

like, cartier. all i want right now, is cartier.

PS, this is the worst constructed entry ever. but i'm far to lazy to actually edit.

nyfw

2011-02-12T15:38:00.003-05:00

two times a year, a wonderful thing happens to the big apple: fashion week. abbreviated to "nyfw" this is the time designers come, models stop eating and people who want to be thought of as avant-garde bring out the crazy and wear their closet with pride.

i know it might seem a little typical, but i love fashion. i think it is a really interesting form of art, and is a nifty way for people to express themselves. often, i always wish i could dress like a runway model (and often dream about their body...different conversation) but what i have slowly realized is this: the runway looks you often see are not made for "normal wear" - instead, they are heightened fashion outfits - not made to be copied but rather influence how you dress. basically, take a few pieces you love from the line, and make it your own.

so, because i like to pretend i am a budding socialite (i swear, if i do become a socialite, and people read this, i am joking) i was able to partake in the festivities known as nyfw. this was my first fashion show, for perry ellis. a few things to take away:

1. shows do not start on time. it's like, everyone is on european time and saunters in at least 20 minutes past the scheduled start time.
2. not all the shows are at the tents. note, the "tents" are at lincoln center and are the center of it all. the hub if you will. many designers have their own/rented/borrowed spaces throughout the city to show their line. the bigger the show/designer/name/money - the more likely you can find it at the tents.
3. this is going to be obvious, but watching a show online or on the designers site is MUCH different than actually watching it live and in the flesh. the shows themselves, they are fucking exciting.
4. the tents themselves, they don't hold thousands of people. maybe a few hundred. so to get a ticket to them, it's a big deal because well, compare that to however many people live in the city and want to see the fashion week shows.

so the show! i brought mary to the show and we were sitting in the fourth row at the end of the runway. we had a great vantage point because we would be able to see the models walk the long walk down and pause in front of us before turning around. and without warning, the lights went down, and the whole tent stopped talking. you can't even get that to happen in a movie theatre! and all of a sudden, it began. the music starts, a model appears and the lights queue to bright and it happens. look after look, the models did everything you expect them to do.

the shows are fast. 10-15 minutes of men strutting down the runway looking hot. you almost can't take it all in. but, what got me, was the energy. even though it is fast, you are so excited to see the next look, and for me, you want to revisit looks. there were some pieces i wanted to steal and, let's be honest, some of the models too. it should be like, free model with purchase. i die.

as my first fashion show, i felt like a million dollars. just walking through the main line and showing our tickets for reserved seating was the best feeling in the world. i don't know, i know i am still quite low on the totem pole, but i felt like i had arrived or something corny like that. fashion shows are just things to a lot of people, and i was able to make it a reality by actually attending one. even better, i was glad mary could join me: i feel like shows are something you should experience with people you love. kind of like, expensive wine and your first arrest. and i'm pretty sure we both were on cloud nine afterwards.

new york fashion week. it's a fucking rush.

also, mary blogged and her take can be found here.

you know you love me

2011-02-08T10:13:00.003-05:00

gossip girl has returned. and i love it. it's like, major fluff for your brain. it's deliciously styled (i wish i dressed like the cast on a regular basis, but i am lazy and don't have hours to lounge and get ready) and witty. but remember, you have to shut off your brain - you can't just watch it and expect truth - you have to watch it and stop all reason. one of the best parts of the show happens to be the 'New York Magazine' recap - which comes out every tuesday and the writers of the blog give points for things and take away points all based on plausibility. and trust me, the plot can be unbelievable at times, but also, like the best episodes of 'mean girls' ever (if said film was a television show/real life).

and the past two episodes have taken place in the publishing world, and of course, the writers are doing their best to make sure the world of anna wintour is insane! and crazy! and packed with running around like the world is about to end. insane and crazy and lots of running! like, 'creature from the black lagoon' mixed with every b-level horror movie where people have to run.

since the writers work in publishing (as do i for a short while longer) they can write and about the truth and lack thereof. and this truth rang true:

• Blair gets assigned ten things to do in the first hour she shows up at work? Ten things that Epperly helpfully typed out on a list? Since when are internships that organized? Our interns sit around on Twitter all day and are lucky if, at some point, someone happens to pass by and ask them to make a list of things Natalie Portman said this month that made her sound fat.

truth because our interns beg to pack boxes because they are le bored. and trust me, the world where i work is not full of people dressed for a runway show and on the verge of eating a post-it note. we are calm beings - for the most part. life is like that. real life. not television.

but it's television, and yes, it's fun to see a heightened version of my life. because in my mind at times, publishing is batshit crazy.

fly away with me

2011-02-03T13:02:00.002-05:00

as many of you know, i love film. to an insane degree. i love the advertising aspect of films, the joy of a friday night opening and of course, award season. each year, my whole five-year old self comes out to play and like a kid in the sand, i go nuts. i watch what everyone wears, i listen to their speeches and i approve or judge who won.

lately, i have wanted to have some changes - some shake-ups and surprises when the awards are handed out and even those who are nominated. while i am (sadly!) not a voting member of the academy, i hope the voting members are not easily swayed by the media and the "for your consideration" ads found in the trade magazines. meaning, i hope everyone allowed to vote actually watches the films that are nominated. ps, i would love to join the academy. it would be a dream come true. seriously.

so, this also makes me wonder why some people are nominated, while others are not. i don't know the whole nomination process (it's lengthy i've come to find out per my research) and it intrigues me that some people are not nominated though i often think they should be. examples would be this years documentary race, where the hilarious "joan rivers: a piece of work" and interesting "waiting for superman" were not nominated - even though both were critical darlings in the film community and general public.

another example (but there is a reason!) would be the costume design for darren aronofsky's "black swan." the dark film has costumes designed by kate and laura mulleavy - and i know most people will not know who those are. but the sisters are the creative duo behind the fashion line 'rodarte' which i hope many of you have heard of. if you have seen the film, you know the costumes are a major component of the film (as well as the score which gives it a nice off-key tone and the art direction) - the sisters handmade the ballet costumes and the crown. long story longer, they were not eligible by the academy.

and here is the reason: it's about getting credit where it is due. meaning, the sisters didn't negotiate being credited in the final cut of the film and only the official designer of the film will get the nomination. which hurts the sisters and the general costumers because sometimes, and "black swan" being an example, the costumes helped make the picture. and in my naive world, i feel they did the most work and helped give the film a feeling.

i wish they would take a play from the tonys, which awarded all three leads for "billy elliot" the tony for best actor. normally, the tonys nominate the individual who acted the part on opening night - but the organization overruled and it was for the better.

so any thoughts? any people you actually wished was (or have been) nominated that wasn't?

when you dream

2011-02-01T21:14:00.002-05:00

so, it has happened. that one obstacle we must all eventually come too: the second job.

it's true, empty internet space and few readers - i have accepted a new job. this is important for a variety of reasons.

1) i am moving back into advertising. i have always loved advertising. i find it truly interesting and it is something i love through and through. i've grappled (i am sure you have read) with the notion of where i fit in with advertising and this new job is the perfect starting off point to get me where i want to be. plus, the client is just awesome.

2) as much as i love my current position and the people i work with, i was starting to itch. i think it was because it was my first job, and i wanted to really begin my career. i say that because when i graduated, i didn't know exactly where i fit in (point 1) and there were no job opportunities available because the recession was swinging its big stick and demolishing everything in site. so, i'm not saying i took the first job that was waved in my face, but i did take a job that i thought "maybe this will be perfect." and it was perfect for then, but overall, i don't think it was perfect for the future. someone else is going to get my job, and they are going to love it and make it theirs. i wish them all the luck.

3) i am living in the big apple, and have moved jobs. this. is. HUGE! yes, i am very lucky to have a job, and even luckier to not have a lapse in working. and it means i am mildly successful in establishing myself in the city. i hope that doesn't come across as cocky. i just am really excited that i can make a move and not be lost.

so that's that. i am going to miss some things about my job, but excited and overjoyed about the new things i will learn and experience. which is what is really important i do believe.

in other news, snow has fallen all over the city and it's past the point of acceptable. really, i would like to fast forward to early spring and enjoy the sun because i am in dire need of a tan. i think most of new york can agree with me on that. i mean, i saw a picture of me on facebook and it was insane - almost on par with edward cullen. yeah, i went there.

i'm off to go burrow.

maybe we should love the alarm clock.

2011-01-13T22:30:00.004-05:00

as part of my daily routine, i get up in the mornings, and i get dressed. sometimes, i dress well. other times, i dress exceptionally well. depending on how exceptional i am at getting my feet into my pants and my shoes on right is a matter that rests completely on the idea of time. meaning, the earlier i get up, the more time i can throw on three different outfits as opposed to just 1.5.

but i have recently come across a much better reason to get up early. i know, i know. this is what you are thinking:

you: but, what is better than getting up early to try on multiple outfits? there is nothing -
me (cutting you off with a hand to the face and a look of "duh") ABC family.

yes, it's true. the early mornings are ripe with television shows i grew up with. nostalgia is what this is called. so, i get up in the mornings, feed francis, our fish, eat my breakfast and sit on the sofa and remember what it was like to be in elementary school. i know tbs has saved by the bell. but mr. feeny! and all those lessons about being good. i just can't get enough. and you can even find 'sabrina, the teenage witch' which always makes me wonder if clarissa really explain it all.

and the great thing is, these people we watched grow up, graduate, and eventually get cancelled is this: they don't get put in the tabloids for doing blow. or rehab. or anything like, exhaustion. the kids of yesteryear, in my humble opinion, were clean, great people. i mean, the only thing that is really stopping them are poor movie/television choices. but i guess they can laugh all the way to the bank because syndication pays the big bucks.

but, in the end, we have dvr. and tomorrow, i still plan on looking good. it's friday afterall.

happy new year!

2011-01-08T13:30:00.005-05:00

scene: the prepster apartment, saturday morning/afternoon, winter
issue: the cable is down

yes, it's true. the cable, the gorgeous cable that beams through from the heavens into our television, is down. not working. access has been denied. life, as we know it, will continue. but so far, on this cold, winter day, it looks bleak. and being mildly ill (still?!?!? it's been like a week, at least) all i want to do is curl up, like a big cute fluffy dog, and lay on the sofa watching all the trashy television i can, knowing full well my brain cells are escaping at an alarming rate.

the tv screen is dark. so, i do what people in the old times did. i got on my phone and called people. followed by a short reading of the new york times, and some blog reading. not too shabby. but i will try not to make a habit of this. it's hard.

the good ladies at "a tale of two cities" did a little end of the year quiz. and to help me through my plague of no television, i have decided to do it.

______ was so not worth stressing over.
All I could listen to this year was ________.
Next year I promise to________.
The best thing I ate in 2010 was ________.
The night of the Lost series finale I was ________.
_______will be the new cupcake flavor in 2011.
I'm proud that I ________ this year.
Remember when Kanye ________?

My answers:

that one guy was so not worth stressing over.
All I could listen to this year was the glee cast album.
Next year I promise to have more confidence in the things i do.
The best thing I ate in 2010 was the appetizer and dessert at nougatin (the main course, not so much).
The night of the Lost series finale I was on the UWS, with good friends.
cupcakes without icing will be the new cupcake flavor in 2011.
I'm proud that I didn't change who i am because of where i work this year.
Remember when Kanye 's tweets were turned into songs by josh groban?

so it's the new year. and i hope it is delightful. i have my resolutions - the same ones i will break soon, don't worry. but i hope i can make a change. i'm like, getting older. i wish you all a great new year, and can't wait to see what is in store.

ps, if our cable isn't fixed soon, i might go ballistic and actually go outside.

mentally frustrated

2010-12-13T19:47:00.003-05:00

this won't be a happy post. or fun, exciting or anything particular riveting.

so, i have a job that i should be clearly in love with. i should adore it. i am fortunate, yes. i know this. but this feeling just digs and digs until it's this all controlling hole of doom. so today, my boss did something i never thought possible - blamed me for something i had no control over. come, gather. story time.

nevermind, no story. without going into dramatic detail, what happened today was completely disrespectful on his end. i haven't felt so belittled in such a long time (if ever), and it was, to a certain degree, rather humiliating.

so, i am going to move on. and just finish the year on a high. i think we all need a break and i need one now before i say something rash. you know.

on a side note, i am so excited to go home to texas for christmas! and so excited to sleep and eat and do everything like i am 16. but not pregnant.

i am also about to eat so we shall part ways for now.

ps, it's snowing. hello, winter.

more blogging please.

2010-12-01T00:32:00.003-05:00

i should blog more. and it's probably criminal of me to even complain about blogging more/not enough on my actual blog. but it is true! i was looking at my side bar of posts, and it showed i only did one post in november. one! it really is the loneliest number.

welcome december. it is finally here. this year has gone by way to fast, and i can't believe we are already at the end of twenty ten. such a good year. but this isn't the post where i talk about my feelings and get nostalgic. no. this is a post where i reprimand myself for not posting enough.

i don't have much else to say. i am le tired (so take a nap...then fire ze missiles!) so i will go snuggle with my 40238304829 pillows in my bed.

'tis the season

2010-11-24T16:45:00.003-05:00

ahh, the holiday's are upon us. i know this for the following reasons:

1. the tree at rockefeller is currently being decorated, and the ice skating rink is open for business and engagements.

2. the windows for all department stores on fifth avenue are festive and gorgeous and full of things that are impossible to wear on a regular basis. (editor's note (my own note): i have yet to experience the windows - maybe this weekend?)

3. holiday music is playing loudly in grocery stores (and what i assume to be all stores, but i've only been in grocery stores lately because...it's the holiday's!)

4. winter accessories!

5. lights all over the streets

6. as of today, the day before thanksgiving, people are setting up shop to sell christmas trees. i think the prepster apartment will be the owner of a christmas tree. maybe we should name her. NOTE: when erin and i first had our thanksgiving in nyc together, way back in 2008, we spent it in westchester with my godmother. when we came back that evening with the understanding family is the same everywhere, we found christmas trees decorating every. single. street. corner. and open for business. the smell was crisp and delicious. that smell of fresh pine that only the holidays can bring. (don't let pine-sol fool you)

7. the weather is bi-polar and currently fighting itself for attention. this has nothing to do with the holiday's, only a statement.

8. holiday movies!

now, as a new yorker (whoa!) i get to do one thing - complain about being in the greatest city in the world during the holiday season. i can make faces about tourists stopping in the middle of the road looking at...what? a building? the sun? a plane? who knows. i get to yell into my phone when i am late for something because i can blame it on holiday traffic. and those who are new yorkers all say "ahhhh" because they know what it is like. those people, even thought they may not be my friend (their loss, clearly) will all go "ahhhh" with me because they understand my plight.

the city, while amazing, is not ours right now. we kindly, gently, with some sass and a little bit of attitude, hand the city to those who come for some joy and family memories. for some high-kicking at radio city. to make their own holiday movie. yes, the city that never sleeps is being whored out and we are dealing with it.

unlike the summer, we don't have the hamptons to escape to. during the winter, we have our apartments. and, for those who are lucky - and i think that's all of us - we have our friends to keep us warm and give us the fuzzies. what i am saying, our homes in the city during the winter are what the summer homes are in the hamptons. (if i wasn't so blah i would draw you a diagram, but i think you can manage. you're smart.)

so in case anyone asks where the new yorkers are during the winter, just know this: we're not hibernating, we're entertaining.

a lounging saturday day.

2010-10-30T18:07:00.003-04:00

as a budding socialite, wait. let me rephrase.

i have a minor goal in life to become a socialite. and to be featured on page six or as a blind item. my goals are lofty, and quite aspirational. and ones that will one day become true. i hope. i pray. i wish and hope.

so, let's resume.

as a budding socialite, i have been featured not once, but twice! on mary and annie's blog. You can read about annie and i's exploits in Los Angeles, and then you can enjoy the recap of recaps by my roommate mary for the preptser pumpkin palooza. And possibly enjoy the best picture ever. I will let you decide what that picture is.

i am watching one of the worst movies of the year, "i love you, beth cooper" and i am about to request this move be removed from hbo. so it's taking over my attention right now, this movie. and terribleness of it. i don't suggest you watch it. and if you must, have some alcohol.

and, today, i had a haircut. it was at this really great place called "salon 13" and it is on 13th and b. in texas and oklahoma, haircuts are about 30 bucks for a dude - at a salon. and that is what i was used to paying. but in nyc, the price for a haircut is about double that. and that's on the cheap end. luckily, i get a discount at bumble and bumble thanks to work, but the place can still be expensive, and the overall experience is rather overwhelming. b&b will have one person wash your hair, then another to cut it, and sometimes a new person to dry it. it's just overly complicated.

so, i have also wanted to try something new with my hair, since it's curly. and can be rather fro-ish. so, the lady who cut my hair, alx, was amazing. and she cuts hair for 'the killers' and we all know that is one of my favorite bands. so she already had points. plus! she gave me a beer to drink while she went to town. so really, the experience was way above what i was expecting, and cheaper.

that has been my day today.

boomer sooner.

welcome to cloudy la, mr. wright.

2010-10-18T22:54:00.002-04:00

this blog will be hard to write about, because i don't want to name names or get into some details. not that i am ashamed of anything (i'm not) so i will write this blog using codes.

working for my awesome company, i get to do many fun things. i get to eat a lot of food in our awesome cafeteria, and i get to work in one of the prettiest buildings in the city.

i also get to work on an awesome project, which means i was able to take my first business trip to los angeles, california. which, was not sunny at all. and i didn't see the hollywood sign the entire time. true story.

the trip was wonderful, and i was able to visit my friend annie, who lives in los angeles and gets to see the hollywood sign all the time, and isn't sad when she can't because she lives there. and it's always there. she took me on some tours of places to eat, be seen and we shopped just a tad. on rodeo drive of course! the best part though, was being able to unwind in her perfect apartment and veg out watching gossip girl, season one, for about 7 hours. we had some scones, from bricks and scones of course, and lounged like there was no tomorrow.

we also ate in-n-out. which doesn't need an explanation or detailed description, but only, YUM! i would eat that daily. and then get fat and then be unhappy. vicious circle really.

overall, my trip to la, however cloudy, was wonderful. i accomplished what i needed to do for work, and while i had the most stressful two days of my life - i don't do well with stress because i'm sometimes a drama queen and i'm gay - it was perfect. it helped me grow in my position, so i know what to expect. and i'm prepared for a lot of things now. and when someone asks me about a stressful situation and how it was handled, i have the perfect story. and it goes like this:

"i went on a business trip, working on the ... "

you know you love me.

xoxo

let's go to the movies.

2010-09-27T22:53:00.004-04:00

just yesterday i had the best idea eh-eh-eh-v-er for a blog post. and just yesterday, i forgot said blog post. such is life. and yet, here i am, trying to reclaim said blog post.

a weekly tradition has been enacted here at the prepster apartment. sunday funday brunch and movies. i say tradition because when the weather begins to cool, and we can't really enjoy the outdoor weather because it's the same temperature of the north pole, we're going to need to do something indoors. and that my friends, is the worst sentence and thought process ever. basically, it's only been two weeks. and those two weeks have been practice. we've been watching a shameful (note: i'm not really ashamed) amount of disney films. not like, homeward bound disney. i mean, disney classic animated films.

oddly, for someone such as myself who loves film, i've seen very few of the classic ones. but the renaissance disney films, i can recite by heart. anyway, i know what you are thinking: what do you wear?!

we wear pajamas. duh.

and i also know what you are thinking now: what do you eat?!

simple really. brunch food. this past week we - ok. i should said who we is. we is myself. and jill. soon, more people will come forth in our sunday funday extravaganza, but that is a case by case basis. and also, when they decide to come over. we act exclusive, but we love everyone. we're like glee! so anyway, we made stuffed raisin bread french toast. and then watched three disney films. once we've exhausted our disney vault, we will move onto a new genre. john hughes. musicals. movies that make you cringe at the very mention (any movie hillary duff has ever starred in (OH I JUST REMEMBERED MY POST IDEA - it's about movie stars (using that term lightly) and what they do after they hit their peak!); any movie based off an SNL skit; cuba gooding jr.) - the ideas are endless! but brunch will always be in our stomachs. plus, i love brunch food. and entertaining. don't you?

it's time for me to go to bed, and i hope you are all thinking about brunch now. cheerio.

mushing of the mind

2010-09-11T22:40:00.002-04:00

for everyone not living in new york city, and those who believe fashion is about engrossing as the paving of a sidewalk, friday night marked the second annual "fashion's night out." basically, every major store in midtown - parts of madison avenue and fifth avenue - as well as the meatpacking district and soho had events. these events ranged from staying open past eight in the evening, to having full on open bars. i preferred the latter.

it's a great event which was the brain child of one, ms. anna wintour. and i am really content to see so many stores taking part. essentially, the goal was to get people to shop when the entire economy was in shambles, and it is still the goal. these stores have celeb appearances, champagne and little marketing ploys to get you in. for instance, gant had half naked models standing outside the store. abercrombie, eat your heart out. which reminds me to never walk by the abercrombie store on fifth because they are PUMPING their cologne/scent-of-preteen-children out into the open and it reeks.

so, gant, i love gant clothing. tres adore. michael bastian is currently designing the line - it's a mens line only - and he is just amazing. it's such great stuff! i suggest you check, check, check it out. like, right now. i'll wait.

anyway, most people go cray cray over celeb guests, or celeb appearances. or just a plain ole celeb sighting. just last post, i saw chelsea clinton and totally kept it together. i could have had a conversation with her and not even broken a sweat. what i am trying to say, celebs don't get to me. i never would turn into a bowl of soggy cheerios just because i was talking to chelsea clinton. however, jake gyllenhaal is a totally different matter though.

back to the main road, i find out that michael bastian is AT GANT! i have him sign my book. i get to take a picture with him. i turn into a soggy bowl of cheerios and can't say anything or relative intelligence. i look like a bumbling fool. i probably acted like a bumbling fool too. so now, i see celebs don't bother me. fashion designers though, i love. i. love.

overall, a very successful evening. i hope you are all able to come visit and enjoy the very fashionable night out.

ps, if i wasn't so freaking tired, i would go into more detail about the amount of weird clothing i saw, and how i think it could be better. maybe next post. au revoir.

have you-uh seen the-uh cow

2010-09-06T18:37:00.002-04:00

good evening readers (at the time of this posting at least)

this has been a much needed weekend of relaxation and lounging. which, is just fine by me. to recap, friday, erin and i went and has a slumber party, watching movies from our past. specifically, "my best friends wedding" which was a phrase i stated often when sean tied the knot with jami.

side note, i don't know if i actually did a recap of said wedding, but it was beautiful and classy. the men wore tuxes, and the women wore long dresses. the bride wore white too.

after seeing julia in "eat, pray, love" i have decided i like her more when she is fun and bubbly. don't get me wrong, i love "erin brockovich" but her laugh and smile was made for romantic comedies. "notting hill" being my favorite.

also, to coincide with america's sweetheart, today, monday, i saw the one and only chelsea clinton in chelsea returning many wedding gifts. i wish she was in my social circle.

i am having sever add right now....so i will do the rest of the post in about 30 min or so...

ok, i am back. somewhat settled.

so erin and i had a great night of movie watching, which was then followed by a drunken brunch. brunch happens to be one of my favorite meals. i mean, breakfast is also one of my favorite meals, but brunch just is more relaxing. and more apt for alcohol.

and speaking of "notting hill" about a few lines up, it is on. and i am going to watch it. my add is pleased.

over the hill

2010-09-01T21:05:00.002-04:00

i am now officially over the hill. at least, in my 20s. which ain't no thaaaaang.

now that that is out of my system...

i had a great birthday full of wonderful friends and laughter. mary decorated my door and it was pure love. and she managed to find the coolest glassware around. i also treated myself with my birthday money to a few fancy purchases of the burberry kind. if you know me, you know i love burberry. j'adore burberry more specifically. so i feel pretty, oh so pretty. i am hoping to enact a burberry night where mary and i drink to our prepsterness and lounge in our burberry attire. the ladies who lunch have a few new members and a possible alcohol problem.

work is getting busy. busier. so i need to work on "my organizational skills" which is a direct quote from my boss. and i mean, i understand i am not super organized at all times, but i have my own way of doing things and it makes sense to me. it just annoys me that he assumes i am going to rethink my entire way of business skills because he wants things done a certain way. in all my life, it's a two way street. so i find it annoying because i find myself unproductive, constantly stepping around things, wondering if i should do that or not do that. i think it also stems from the fact my boss needs constant attention. and even today, i was talking to someone and he pulls me into his office only to ask what the person wanted. it was bizarre. bizarre i tell you. biiiiiizzzzzzaaaaaaare.

on a completely different note, i have noticed my midsection is starting to resemble a bagel. which stems from me eating A LOT of bagels. so i am going on a little diet (very little, like i won't always have the last bite) and starting to run again (run, like 1 mile at a time. let's not get fancy.) i would think with the stress of my job and the stress of being awesome at all times would make me lose weight like that, but no. it takes work. and if it is because i just became a man of a certain age, my body and i are going to have some words.

i am going to watch the little mermaid with the rooms. honest.

birthday weekend!

2010-08-22T16:55:00.002-04:00

happy august people. and happy birthday week to me. as you may or, most likely, not know, my birthday is this week. and it is my golden birthday since i will be turning the same age as my birthdate. my mom said she should get an award for birthing me, and i said she should. but after me of course.

i am quite excited about this birthday. i don't know why really. sean, my best friend, came with his now wife for our birthday last year, as we have the same birthday. he is one year older however. but it was great to see him. nostalgic thinking right now. all together now, awwww. but this year, i will be with friends, at a job i love, and will top it off in rhode island to see my close friends who are my extended family. again, all together now, awwww. and...happy birthday!

to kick off my birthday, mary and i hosted a little housewarming party to great fanfare. the apartment is much larger than i thought to hold people, and i think will be a great place to have parties. i hope mary agrees.

by the way, this is a little bothersome. you see, i wanted to go to a gay club called "splash" here in new york city. and i was bringing all of my friends for the event. however, we were turned away at the door for reasons that are summed to me as this: too many girls, not enough dudes. which i find quite hypocritical for a world who wants to be accepting, but then has all these clauses on what is allowed and not allowed. it's rude. and we were treated rudely. we met all the dress code criteria, if there was one. and trust me, my friends are pretty. much prettier than the people waiting to get in line. honestly, i want an explanation. so clearly, the only way to get one is to blog about it. ugh.

but that won't stop me from having a monumental birthday with people i love.

also, mary has decorated our apartment in the most amazing fashion. vintage and 60s flow through the living room and i love it. you. will. die. it's just awesome. i love our space. come visit. anytime.

happy birthday to everyone else.

today is friday.

2010-07-16T12:41:00.003-04:00

it's officially the middle of summer. maybe not officially, but i have deemed it as such because it is the middle of july.

to note: it's japan day in our cafeteria. but we won't eat there today. we being the minions of my company. no no, we will be heading to goodburger for a joyous friday meal. my goal is to eat a huge cow and have it soak up any lingering toxins from the debauchery of last night. which would be thursday night. for those who need help keeping up with dates and such (read: me).

i had a friend from home (the great state of texas) come in for a visit. but not to visit me personally, for an NYU immersion thing. so, we went to a gallery opening in chelsea. not so much an opening, but the premiere of the new collection. it was interesting, and there were a few pieces i enjoyed but not sure if i would purchase them. plus, they were photographs. and as a former photographer, i am intrigued by the ability for people to charge upwards of 15,000 bucks for a photograph. photography just interests me in the whole process.

for instance, it is such a manipulative artform. you are able to edit things by cropping and what not. i need to form my thought more clearly, but i hope you are able to see where i am going. and some things are just happy accidents. i don't know. i love some photographs and they really speak to me, but it's one of those things that i am wary of because it can be so molded. but i guess the other argument is all art can be manipulated as such. i should read more about this. and then present my findings in a better form.

and how interesting to have a huge series of pictures and then you just pick one. i want to know why they picked that particular one. the context. the reason. but you don't get that sometimes. i like to be informed. that's why i like smart people who are smart in an area (sean for tech, mary and co. for art, val for food) because they can inform me with these things.

we also went to nobu, an asian restaurant that is celeb worthy most of the time. i will say i didn't care for it. so when the mighty chef himself freaks out, i will say i have had better sushi at whole foods. there. i said it. block me.

my stomach is growling. must. eat.

let's build mountains

2010-07-11T22:38:00.000-04:00

So a lot has happened in the past month. And I am so sorry I haven’t actually kept up with my blog. But such is life when life happens. But my goal is to work on this more. I think it’s a good outlet of things and I know all of you are just dying to know my life.

On june 28th, I moved from my upper east side apartment to an apartment in the village. I have a new roommate by the name of mary (she has a blog which she shares with her best friend who lives in LA and you can follow her at the link to the right) and she is going to be wonderful to live with. I can just tell. I honestly can’t wait to see what is in store. And now that I have new digs, I have added to my furniture collection and I think my bedroom is officially done. I don’t want to post pictures because I don’t want you design snobs to judge.

What I love about the new apartment is the location. It is so convenient to anything I do. Work is a straight shot up to the building. And the subways, like all of them, are literally right around the corner. Plus, there are delicious restaurants and bars so close and it’s just a great place to live. I don’t think I will ever get this lucky so I better enjoy it now. My goal is to start visiting the neighborhood haunts more and more and staying away from the same old. I want to be a master of this area. Which I think is an excellent goal for the time being. I just need to make sure I watch my wallet too.

But since I am living more downtown, I think/I hope my cabs will be fewer and cheaper than living in the high 80s. and this will give me a few extra dollars to spare. Only time will tell though about this but already I have a great feeling.

Living with mary will bring a whole new group of friends into my life and I am more than excited to have them. I really like how we all have the same interests and enjoy doing the same things – we don’t mind braving the 16 dollar movie ticket, and we enjoy art (but they know far more than me) – so it’s refreshing to have that in my life. Not that I am getting old, and want to say I am old, but working in the “real world” you learn that it’s not always about partying and coming home at 4 in the morning. It eventually catches up, and you don’t have anything to show for it. But the arts and movies and food and wine, well that is what makes your life rich and noteworthy.

In addition to the above friends, I have also found a great group of friends in the working world. Which is probably odd for some, and might not be the best idea to others, but it’s great to go out with these people and let loose. Where I work can be an interesting place to say the least, and it’s very high school to sit at the lunch table and discuss the events. Not in a catty way, but these are people who are dealing with the same thing as me, so we can all vent or help each other out in some way or another.

And while work can be stressful for no good reason, I love that we can have fun with each other. We keep it professional of course at work, so don’t worry.

In big news, I bought myself the iphone 4. I should say my mom bought it actually. But I love it, and it has changed my life. Overstatement of the year most likely.

and now, i am off to bed.

glee is on and the songs suck.

2010-04-27T21:27:00.002-04:00

essentially, i don't know where i belong.

my last post, i discussed my lack of emotional attachment to the ads i was creating, and inability to muster any creative juices.

recently, i began a new job and it has been an interesting place to begin. it's not advertising, but rather marketing. and i was very excited to start this new chapter because i thought of all the new possibilities it would bring. so i went into it with new hopes and dreams, wondering what i would become in a few short years.

but a few things happened:

one, it was helping a friend concept and work on the creative for their campaign - this was done as part of their 4A's program. and i loved it. i missed it. i missed the idea of being part of a team and thinking of ways to make a brand come alive.

two, i began looking at my job in a new way. which was how it was going to be creative in the future. the problem was, it wasn't. the people involved in my area are constantly working to just sell. the creativity is not there. and the work environment isn't terrible, don't get me wrong, it's just different.

i feel like i have to constantly play down something and try to become something i don't think i am meant for.

i just don't know where i belong anymore. or how i am supposed to make it. i love advertising. and i dream advertising. so now i think i am getting too far removed from it.

i love advertising. but maybe not the advertising i thought i loved?

2010-03-19T18:57:00.004-04:00

this might be a word vomit post.

the first few moments of spring have occured. and i must say, the city of new york is a glorious place to be. she looks great dressed in sunlight. all bright and cheerful. like a well dressed woman who is showing some leg for the first time in a while. a welcome shock that sends your heart racing just a wee bit.

a lot has happened in the past few weeks and i would love the chance to share.

first, we all know i have been trying to better myself through the education of higher learning from SVA. it's been a great run, but i have realized that i overdid it by taking two classes this semester. i should have stuck with one and focused all my attention on that. with that, i am thinking about taking the class, or one of the classes over again next semester. that is, if i don't have a job by then. which, let's hope i do. this economy better get the ball rolling in kicking butt again because i am not going to have it any longer. nor do i think most other people will either. it's a pretty depressing state still.

however, these classes have taught me something. and that something is this: i might not really love creative as much as i thought i did when i first started out. i mean, i love being creative and i love creating things and it is truely a gift that i have. so i am pretty fortunate. but, the whole experience has left this dreadful taste in my mouth. working on the ads, i find myself not even inspired or able to think. it becomes a frustrating endeavor because i just can't get into it! i don't understand. i stare and the paper and keep working on ideas and everything just feels ridiculous. not even a new idea comes to me. and i try to just go crazy.

but i have had this mentality that i am afraid of failing. i blame school for this. because it has ingrained in me this idea that i need to get an 'A' and if i don't, then i have failed as an individual, and therefore have brought shame to my parents for not succeeding and shame to my professors who thought i could have done better.

but i think the true error in all of this is that people in advertising try to pigeon hole you into one thing or another. Copywriter. Art Director. Account. i don't think that you should or can. i do agree some people are better with art than others. And some like words more than others. It's their choice. But i love both. i enjoy layouts and words. additionally, i think that it is important to know both and realize how both work. maybe though, that is what portfolio school is for? oh gosh, another can of worms i just opened.

through this storm of self discovery, i actually have some great news! an amazing agency by the name of mccann erickson called me and told me i was part of their summer internship program as a copywriter! which is by far awesome of awesome. i danced and jumped on the corner of 87th and lexington.

it might not be the best thing to take an internship. afterall, i am almost two years out of college and should get on with my life. but the world (read: the u.s. economy) managed to implode on itself and happened to do it right when i was graduating. sweet.

i am still looking for the job of a lifetime. or the job for right now. i am pretty blessed to have parents and friends who are still supportive. i owe them something nice when i get rich.

snow day.

2010-02-10T23:54:00.002-05:00

today was a snow day for much of manhattan. which is really odd when you think about it because i figured as a city, we would be more than ready for a snow storm. we do have an underground transportation system afterall. but really, it gave everyone and their sweatered dog a reason to leave work early or not go to work at all. which is fine by me.

except, snow hurts. i was pelted in the eye twice by those pretty, light-as-a-feather droplets of frozen beauty. straight in the eye. and it didn't hit me gingerly either. it was like the firing of a musket from above straight into my eye. my left eye, both times, to be exact. that story is neither here nor there.

this week has also given me my first foray into food poisoning. judging by the effects i endured, i would never wish for that on anyone. the jury is still out on the culprit of said poisoning, but let's just say i haven't really changed my diet. i will never learn. but it did make me yearn for my mother and her tender care to take excellent care of me. instead, i hobbled to my own kitchen to fetch my own water which was just a tad to cold for my poor souls liking. and i am kidding. but not really. i do miss my mom and her always there with food and drink self. it's hard being an adult and taking care of yourself. i should have been better prepared for life.

internship is going well too. i have realized i excel in my writing once i have a greater understanding of the client and the actual goal of the campaign. and i guess that is a pretty duh statement, but once i get emotionally invested, we are good to go.

and classes are going well. i like the copywriting class more than the portfolio class. which is ridiculous because the are basically the same class, just in a different building with different professors. but i like the criticalness of them. and the ability to show my work, however shitty it is. more on the classes later for sure. i am going to bed because i am le tired.

oh look, the future is portable.

2010-02-02T20:12:00.003-05:00

http://www.wired.com/gadgetlab/2010/02/ipad-future/

that above article is really quite interesting on what the future will be for computing. but also, will bring about a new way of advertising? a cleaner way of advertising perhaps?

i don't actually own an iphone. and it isn't because i don't dream about it on a regular basis. i am an apple person. but my family has a carrier other than AT&T, and really, this is getting quite personal isn't it? oh well. i love apple products. end of the paragraph.

but really, i am trying to make a point on advertising. such as, how will advertising work on these new pads? how will advertising work for these new "apps" that are what some say are improvements on the original site. and by some, i mean the person who wrote the article.

i hope advertising does become cleaner. and less annoying. but i wish we didn't need a new thing to do that for us.

i'm not afraid of school.

2010-01-27T09:52:00.002-05:00

so, i have begun a grand escape into higher education. the school of visual arts (sva) is my new home for two classes - portfolio and copywriting. monday was my first class, and it was a doozy. it made me have a tidal wave of emotions that i haven't felt in a long time. most importantly, it made me realize my huge and undying love for advertising.

which, i think is the most important take away from this next semester. as i have been living in nyc for almost 2 years, i have constantly viewed my career as futile. i have had internships and minor jobs, but never a real job, with a real salary and benefits. so i think for me, and most other people in my predicament, i have searched and searched to understand if my job was the right one for me because if it was, then i would be employed.

but then, you have to remember you are one in a million, or thousand at least, in the same situation, gunning for the same thing. which sucks about as hard as being eaten by a bear. because it's a recession, and the economy is an ugly thing right now. and to add with that, you are also competing for the same thing as everyone else.

thirty minutes into the class, i knew i loved it. and i was going to love advertising. it has been a good while since i have been in a classroom, and a while since i have been allowed to think creatively. and it was a glorious and amazing thing to be given full freedom to just create.

i hope these classes give me some great and amazing and lovely things to put in my portfolio. because let's be honest, i want a job. it's my dream and it's exactly who i am.

good news.

2010-01-11T16:54:00.002-05:00

The past few days have been rather interesting in job searching.

Part A)

I have been searching for internships to coincide with my schooling. I have just been cold calling agencies and someone actually answered. talking to the person on the other line, it sounded like i might have a decent chance. they never said no, or that they didn't have any space. i figured if they didn't have room, or weren't interested in general, they would have said no. or given me the brush off.

a few weeks went by and i heard nothing, so i followed up. it was right before the holidays and i knew most agencies were closed or not even thinking of hiring/internships/etc. again, she just asked me to give my link to view my work.

PS, i am trying really hard not to say "he" or "she" so i am doing my best to keep it generic.

anyway, received an email later that day saying they had viewed my work and didn't have anything at the time. fair enough.

it just got me really down because it sounded like i had a shot. or at least, something could come of it. and maybe i am not what they are looking for. which is fine. and i totally respect that. but it's rough and difficult to think you see some light at the end of the tunnel and it's gone. just like that. i guess i would have enjoyed a little more upfrontness of it when i first began talking to the agency. such as "well, we might have an internship. it depends on such and such." or "we don't have anything available."

the second sentence is actually what was responded to me. followed by keeping my info on file. it's terrible when all you want is experience and to do what you love and you can't even do that. but it makes me want it more.

Part B)

i had applied for an internship for an agency and went in for an interview this morning. turns out, they liked me and i I will begin next monday. it's a chance for me to remember what agencies are like, and to work on some excellent brands writing long copy. it's two days a week and i hope i will learn a lot that will give me the experience to hit up some bigger agencies or at least find a job as a junior copywriter.

the position will be for one month. talking to HR, she said if it is a good fit, and i am enjoying it they will extend it. sounds promising. i just need to soak up as much as possible during this stint and really make my mark.

interestingly, it doesn't seem like an internship program, like other agencies i have worked with during college. so i feel this might feel more like a "freelance" position, even though it will be an internship.

this doesn't mean i am going to stop looking for positions, or give up on school. this is just the start of what i need for the new year.

interview one of the new year

2010-01-07T10:14:00.006-05:00

i have just returned home from an interview. that's right, a real interview. it is for an internship position as a graphic designer.

i was awake, bright and early - well, it was 6:30 in the a.m. so not that bright - and arrived at the pearly gates around 8:35. i was ten minutes early for my interview and waited patiently for security to make contact with my contact. for the next thirty minutes, i stood in the grand lobby waiting. around me, other interns gabbed and cooed at each other, while i stood around wondering if i was an idiot or had made a mistake on the time, location, etc.

eventually, someone i knew let me up to the building and i waited in their "lobby" for 5 minutes. the interviewee was about forty-five minutes late to the interview and apologized. that's all you really can do in that instance.

the interview went fine. she never looked me in the eye and kept saying "Hmmm, Hmmmm." Followed by, "you have a lot of experience." i do have experience. but not enough experience. i want more experience so people will hire me instead of saying "you have a lot of experience." it's a constant circular battle.

i actually do want the internship. it is for a great company and i know i would learn tons as a designer. and who knows, it might even parlay into an actual job.

what i have gained from this experience is that no matter how prepared you are, people are already going to have their perceptions of you and your work. there is no going around that. so it's all about presentation and being present. ready to jump on their critiques and prove them otherwise. i didn't do that as much this time, but i will next time i have an interview.

so nice. so nice.

2010-01-06T20:29:00.003-05:00

it's cold in new york city, and it isn't unusual. more of a statement. the real annoyance with the cold though, is the amount of clothes you have to put on in order to leave the apartment. it's like, you have to pile it all on, and the second you enter a building, you have to take it all off. because all the buildings are warm. hot. so you essentially look like a bag lady carrying all of your luggage trying to find something in a store. plus, you have encourage your coats and baggage not to hit everything in sight, thus knocking down precious goods.

other than that, today has been pretty full of exercise and reading. i just started "the amazing adventures of kavalier and clay" and am hoping it's as good as they say.

hitting the pavement

2010-01-05T21:16:00.004-05:00

today, i was keeping with my resolutions and called/emailed for jobs.

so, i begin school in two weeks. and i am excited. i can't wait to get back into advertising, being creative and thinking creative and being with people who love advertising just as much as me.

so, to keep me involved, i am searching for internships/jobs. it's a painful experience and one i don't wish upon anyone. ever. jobs are hard right now, and i am completely aware of the competition out there. i just wish someone was on the other end to answer my phone call. or reply to my email.

today, i think i applied for about 6 "opportunities". they are ones i actually feel passion for, and they made me excited to submit my resume. so i hope i hear something.

as for the rest of my day, i did nothing. i stayed in my pajamas. grueling. i know.

on a total side note, i am wearing my retainer and hope my teeth stay straight. random, i know.

2010-01-04T09:36:00.002-05:00

so, i have been meaning to blog for a while, and never really got to do it. and i realized it's because i don't have a reason to really blog. while i know my life is hugely entertaining to basically no one but myself and my close friends, who don't really read this, i didn't want to bore people with tales of grocery shopping and walking to the subway.

BUT! i have a reason. now.

i have been a graduate from OU for about 1.5 years. which is a good solid time to be out and about on my own. i've had excellent internships and work experience. but now, i am going back to school (portfolio school). and looking for a new job as a copywriter in advertising. so this blog, for now, will be of those adventures.

my goal is to document my interviews, school, and at the same time, write. i won't name agencies, or name people unless they are super famous and it has nothing to do with my advertising endeavors.

i'm excited about this. and hope you are too.

today is the last day of 2009

2009-12-31T11:45:00.002-05:00

2009 is winding down in a mere 12 hours. it's safe to say this has been one year of adventure, heartbreak, growing up, dreaming big, regressing and maturing. i've thought a lot about my future, and what it holds. and what it won't hold and how my dreams have changed. some things have changed dramatically, and some have slightly veered off into something new.

it's a new year, a new decade. i'm not going to be a "new me", i've already become the person i need to be. but i will make sure i never grow up and stay forever young.

i have some resolutions. and i think as we get older they become more practical and attainable. i plan on making mine a reality. and i can't wait.

so here is to you, and here is to me. let's make memories.

HSBC wants to be your friend.

2009-09-21T16:52:00.003-04:00

HSBC has recently launched a campaign in New York. And I am not sure if it is global, or has reached other parts of the nation, but it seems to be a huge rebranding campaign. I remember them filming "soap box" in madison square park in the middle of july, asking everyone to choose a topic and state what they think about it.

an example would be bottle water. is it good? bad? apathetic? the individual could just rant or throw accolades depending on their views.

the tagline for the campaign is something along the lines of how they can't continue until they understand everyone. different values make us all different. my words are not as fine tuned as theirs, and i am having a hard time finding the actual ad for them.

side note, it seems in all the google searches i am finding different versions, so i think we were being tested. i could be wrong.

moving on, anyway. HSBC basically took the entire platform of advertising, and created a campaign using our very foundation! we try to understand people. and we interview people and try to find a consensus about them. we also try to figure out how they view things differently and then we create ads around them. but we don't expressly state that in ads. HSBC basically did that. like, could you imagine that board meeting?

"we need to understand our consumers. who are they? what do they think?"
"what a great campaign idea. we need to understand our consumers. use that. let's go."

it's like they went halfway, stopped and ran with it.

and it's annoying. i wish they could have come around and done something different. especially since they are taking these attributes that are not associated with banking and giving them this personality.

this is one example of the ad:

i understand a bank is trying to humanize themselves into a more friendly bank. but i think they should have just focused on banking. and worries about the future. not the bottle water or a shaved head.

what are your thoughts? am i wrong in this whole thing?

ps, this isn't against their banking or anything like that. just the advertising.

the start of something new

2009-09-04T14:18:00.003-04:00

i am currently in my parents house in texas. the house that i called home for a small part of my childhood/adulthood. i say small because we upgraded into our new (which is now current) house during my freshman year of college.

while i would visit in college, it was home. my stuff was still here. i left my crap around without a care. i treated it as my own. it wasn't a vacation coming home, but just a normal visit. i think living in a college town that is 2.5 hours away didn't really cause a problem in what was home and "home". both norman and dallas were home.

living in new york though, i purchased my first plane ticket, with my own money, to come home for a visit. and not just to visit my parents, but to visit college friends who i have not seen in over a year. a real vacation.

so i find it odd, but also mildly exciting, to be part of this journey where i am growing up. and being in a place where a vacation is going to dallas. and not just for a holiday. sure, i have my room. but, it's not my room. i don't have these exciting memories anymore in that room. they are all in my bedroom in new york city.

and i find myself being a little more careful with the house. i see myself more as a guest. maybe because i don't breathe in the house anymore. or come home at 4 in the morning. but i do see how far i've grown. and how much more i will grow.

i am alive

2009-08-19T15:11:00.002-04:00

i have so much to catch up on. birthday's. more birthday's. holy hot summer. my upcoming birthday.

so until then, you will have to hold tight. more of an update, grander and better, to come.

texting is no fun.

2009-07-30T14:23:00.002-04:00

today, i received this little gem in my text message inbox:

"hello jill this is coach robinson for young women 1st sorry 4 text you but im at work n cant talk im texting about ticket for aug.1st if you can about 15 call u"

i have no idea who this person is. i have no idea exactly what they are trying to say. and more importantly, my name is not jill.

but it brought me to an idea, typing in today's society. have we really moved into a culture that beats and abuses the english language in such a way where 'u' really is a substitute for 'you'?

my personal writing style doesn't include things such as capitalization and whatnot. but that is my style. i at least know how to spell out words and form coherent sentences.

i find it rather vile for people to relegate words to mere letters. i seriously wonder what is going to happen to our future, and our language, when it becomes acceptable for someone to type and use words like this professionally. plus the sentence structure of that message just makes me want to beat someone with a dictionary and the ap style guide.

maybe it's because i have a love of words, but i can't bring myself to just throw away all my years of schooling because it is just "easier" to type 'n' in the form of 'and'. it's not really easier. and it really makes the other person seem like a complete fool.

published.

2009-07-08T10:16:00.003-04:00

since i am only beginning what i believe will be a long, fruitful career in advertising, i still have tons to learn. in fact, i will never stop learning when it comes to advertising.

last night, i was reading "rolling stone" trying to catch up on my music, when i came across an ad for speed stick. which probably won't matter to a vast majority of anyone reading this, but i honestly had to do a double take. it was the exact same campaign i had worked on last summer when i was interning for my agency!

the last few weeks of my internship were completely dedicated to the campaign. we went through all the phases of creating a campaign. we also went through client specifications: small budget, mostly print, and nothing ultra crazy.

but there it was, neatly tucked between a regina spektor article and an allman brothers piece, the campaign i helped develop, staring at me.

it's weird to look at something and realize you don't completely love it. not that i expect to love everything that comes out of my head, or have ever written - but life goes on. and to look at something, and touch it, no matter how you felt about it at the time, makes you nostalgic.

which is then quickly followed by rage because you can't believe they thought this was the best creative, and you really wish you could have stayed to see how it all went down.

and to see it in a magazine, that people read, is just crazy. i wish i could show it to everyone, to show them how my summer played out, and to at least get some sort of recognition. so i think that is what i have to learn. the recognition might never come. but that doesn't mean i should stop trying, or doing, or wanting, or loving. i love this industry. i want to grab it by the balls and squeeze.

ps, i don't have a copy of the actual ad, since i left it at home. but you can click to the site here

2009-07-07T12:53:00.002-04:00

i don't really feel like writing a huge narrative of my weekend, but i will give you bullet points.

the fourth was this past weekend, and i must say, it was the best weekend i have had in terms of fireworks, friends, food and drinks.

my mom comes in about 6 days, and i can't wait to let her see me be an adult.

i moved into my first real adult apartment last week. my joy should be felt and heard for months to come.

that is all for now.

denim.

2009-06-30T10:52:00.003-04:00

this article was posted in the NYTimes today.

it was interesting for a few reasons. one, i knew levi's was searching for a new agency last year, and i knew one of the agencies in the running - so i clearly wanted to know who was going to win the account. two, because of the agency they chose.

"Wieden & Kennedy was selected for the assignment, Mr. Sweeny said, because of its “track record for tapping into” popular culture for brands aimed at younger consumers like Nike." Mr. Sweeny, by the way, is the vice president of marketing for levi's.

i already do not like the campaign. i think it is generic. and it doesn't really make me want to jump on the levi bandwagon. and i say this because i am the target market.

also, i think it is ridiculous for them to choose W+K because of the work they do for Nike. yes, most likely there were other reasons in the choosing of said agency, and while i do enjoy the work they produce for nike, among other brands, i think it is because both have created this lasting, beautiful partnership together, while also being given the time to really understand one another, as well as the cultural landscape they advertise in. so, if levi's wants to get back to being awesome, creatively, i hope they are ready to spend the time and energy by building a relationship with W+K.

also:

this is a rebranding campaign, first and foremost. new agency. new creative. new tagline. and while as a country we are facing tough times, i find it odd to wrap a rebranding campaign strictly around the economy. their research shows the target market being optimistic about the future - we're resilient!

i think they should have built a campaign around what they want to be (while also keeping their heritage), and then add parts to it to fit the current climate. because when this is all said and done, they are going back to the drawing board to fit the new climate.

am i wrong in this thought? again, i was not part of the actual pitch, or the selection process, so this is just an opinion.

thoughts on advertising.

2009-06-23T14:50:00.003-04:00

I am quickly beginning to realize the future of advertising is going to be purely digital.

personally, i love interactive advertising (specifically, the Internet). when i first interned with IMC2, i was able to think in a visual capacity, as well as a print medium. and the merging of both created a very interesting and exciting space and place for our message to get across.

As of late, i have noticed many buses carrying these sweet billboards that move. and glow. and provide excellent stimulus to my senses. and even when i was in school, and home in texas, i noticed billboards which changed every 10 seconds or so.

i say this because once, a long time ago, before newspapers were dying, and people didn't have the internet, people read. they read magazines. books. the paper. so i wonder if what people saw on a printed piece of paper, they went out to experience for themselves first hand. after all, an image can be a very powerful thing.

we now have billboards, first done by mini cooper which show RFID technology being used to relate to consumers.

And more importantly, we have fast food menus, television monitors at the box office using digital imagery to entice consumers. which don't get me wrong, is nice to see popcorn and a DP being all delicious looking, but i can get the same sensory satisfaction looking at a well-shot picture.

and late last year, Esquire magazine created the first digital cover to hit mainstream.

we are moving into a generation not content with stationary objects. and that isn't bad, per say, but i think my real worry is: it might eventually take the fun out of experiencing an event.

basically, i think there is a time and place for all advertising. and i think we need to tone down the digital bits. we need to allow user interaction across many mediums, instead of having an explosion all at once. a good campaign has the user seek out the product. gain information.

as a creative, i hope we don't lose touch with the past. someone once said my portfolio lacked "punch. it was boring, because it was print". and i was floored. i was sad. i was angry. i covered a lot of emotional ground in the span of 5 minutes, trust me. but looking back on it, i realized how wrong he was.

print advertising is HARD. it's difficult. it's a process. we are not able to merge visual (moving objects) with the print. we have one way to reach our audience. and it's what i crave. maybe people use both to hide behind their idea, thinking "if we tease them with moving objects, they won't notice the ad sucks."

once you get a good print idea, the rest just falls into place. and a great ad doesn't need a lot of layers. and if the digital parts work, as with my above example with mini cooper, than i say why not. just don't let being digital take precedence over what could become a good ad. and a great campaign.

no title. sorry.

2009-06-16T14:11:00.003-04:00

the weather lately in nyc has been putting me in a sour mood. while i love rain, and highly enjoy splashing in puddles with rain boots on my little (metaphorically speaking) feet, i can only handle so much rain for so long. what can i say, i love the sun.

anyway, this past weekend was wonderful. it was relaxing to just hang out. you know what i mean? we had no set agenda except to eat BBQ. which brings me to the main part of this whole post! the big apple BBQ. i'm from texas. i love meat. and BBQ. and i love it in large quantities. so when i smell charcoal and mesquite wood burning, my heart speeds up to the speed of light in this huge excitement explosion.

so we went and ate. and decided to go eat some froyo (frozen yogurt) and walked around SOHO.

i felt like a real new yorker this past weekend.

oh, and i inexplicably woke up before 8 AM on sunday, so i was able to accomplish many things - running around the park,buying milk, and even hitting up st. patty's for mass. the things that happen in the early morning.

commercial for you.

2009-06-12T09:38:00.002-04:00

i freaking love this commercial

this ad from Kirshenbaum Bond & Partners, New York is for Wendy's, and it's just so much fun. I remember when Wendy's was going through their huge agency overhall and I was unsure of the direction. I haven't really noticed Wendy's advertising until now though.

one year baby.

2009-05-29T10:32:00.002-04:00

today is friday. which means it's the weekend. which means, i am excited.

this past weekend was memorial day. hopefully, everyone out there knew that and was able to celebrate in grand style. i myself made it to a couple of BBQ's and was quite in love with the smell of all things lighter fluid. it reminded me of texas.

one BBQ was in brooklyn. i left the island. and it scared me. also, i looked like i just arrived off my yacht, and had finished a conversation about harvard. naturally, i didn't fit in. it was humorous.

this weekend, one of my close friends and i will celebrate our one year anniversary of moving to the city that never sleeps! it's a big deal. and even though we haven't lived here for a full year (i went to chicago, she went home after our respective internships) we both came back and that is what matters.

so we are going to be all touristy. and cute. and if you see us squealing like 17 year old girls, well, don't be surprised.

something more.

2009-05-21T13:42:00.004-04:00

last night, i was able to see "33 variations", a play starring jane fonda. it closes today, thursday, so i was pretty lucky to see it. plus she was nominated for a tony for best actress, and COME ON! it's jane freakin' fonda.

the show itself was wonderful. not exactly what i was expecting, which isn't a bad thing. most of the actors were excellent - colin hanks is also in it, and i really like him. there are some parts where he sounds just like his dad. i mean, i was wondering if it was indeed mr. tom hanks himself.

today, i received my business cards! which means, i am a real adult. well, not really. but i have cards to hand out to anyone and everyone. i am quite excited.

i have also started a new diet. which isn't like, "new" according to some magazine or televisions how. but it's new to my and my stomach. i have started shopping at whole foods a lot more, and started eating in. while most will say "whole foods is so expensive! how can you afford that?!" i will say:
"well, living in new york, everything is expensive. so for me, there really isn't a price difference on it compared to shopping at the same ole grocery store"

i have been eating tons of fruits (pineapple is my favorite so far. but i love strawberries, and always will), and have switched to organic milk, which doesn't make my stomach make these weird digestive sounds.

i can tell my skin is a little better, and i haven't really gained weight, nor lost it. but i feel much better and brighter, which i feel is a major plus.

the only thing i need to work on is my ability to get up in the morning and run.

whoa. long time.

2009-05-18T12:21:00.004-04:00

it's been quite a while, and it is totally my fault.

the past few weeks have been quite crazy, and i think now i have the time to reflect and obviously discuss.

the weather is changing in nyc, and my allergies are killing me. i can't stop sneezing, my eyes look like i have been doing coke for 13 hours straight, and my body is achy. i know you care.

i moved into my sublet a few weeks ago, and more importantly, i now have my own bed! like, how adult is that? very, i know. it's my first real piece of furniture, and i can't wait to add more.

my job is still going strong, and i love it. i don't have a lot of stuff to do right now, so it's weird for me to just sit here. and update my blog. but they are all busy (all being the partners) and can't really walk me through what they want right this second. but i will wait patiently.

oh, and i am starting to run again. i hope to compete in a marathon or something soon, so watch out for that!

life, updated.

2009-04-27T11:03:00.003-04:00

my life has been all sorts of chaotic lately, but in an awesome, bitchin sort of way.

my job is still fantastic. third week in, and it only seems like the first week. that, my friend, is an excellent sign.

and the most exciting part right now is this beautiful weather NYC has thrown at me. and the city too, i suppose. i am so excited to free my feet of pesky shoes, and let them roam free with some flip flops. i even got a pedicure so i could show them off without feeling slightly insecure. and yes, pedi's are totally manly.

emily, AKA my future roommate, celebrated her birthday week (yes...week. i want a birthday week, so remember that please) and we made it to blockheads, this mexican restaurant with excellent drinks and cheap food by new york standards.

OH! and speaking of food, brother jimmy's BBQ, on the UES, was having this all you can eat ribs and beer night yesterday for 22 bucks. coming from texas, and being male, i descended upon the joint with an open stomach ready to be filled. and it was delicious. heavenly. new york knows something about bbq, so i highly recommend it. plus it is making me very excited for the BBQ festival coming up in june.

you know you love me. xoxo.

culture.

2009-04-17T09:58:00.006-04:00

living in new york, i am afforded many opportunities to be cultured. and i am beginning to take up the city's offer now that the weather is beginning to not suck and i actually have the funds to do things involving money.

last weekend, my wonderful and future roommate, emily, invited me to see a musical which just opened up on broadway: 'next to normal'. it blew my mind. honestly, you can't really go wrong with any show on broadway because it is a guaranteed good time. plus, i'm gay so anything that involves choreography, music and flashing lights makes me giddy with excitement.

the music is phenomenal. the actors were all believable. and it helped not knowing what i was getting myself into because there are a few twists and turns along the way. which work. ask emily - i gasped when things were revealed. and while i didn't cry - the straight/frat guy in me is able to maintain some composure - i was THISCLOSE to crying.

so, go see the show. you will love it too. and invite me.

last night, i went to see 'valentino: the last emporeror'. this too was amazing. now, if you don't live in new york, or attend major film festivals, i doubt this will come to a theatre near you. but if it does, go see it.

it's not a 'devil wears prada' type of movie. it's a documentary. and it's wonderful. i love clothes, and fashion and it was breathtaking to see how he worked, and how his team of seamstresses worked as well. everything is by hand! i was so shocked. and it made me appreciate clothing, and the art of designing so much more.

plus, he's a cute old man. even if he does look a little crispy for my taste.

so there is a quick wrap-up of my week in culture.

work is grand

2009-04-15T16:10:00.002-04:00

there is a stark difference as an intern and as an actual employee. there are the most obvious examples - salary, benefits and having a position that won't expire after 12 weeks simply because that is the length of the internship.

and it recently dawned on me that this job is my first. i have had summer jobs, but THIS job is the first one where i am doing exactly what i have trained to do for four years. this is my first job doing what i love.

so yes, there is a huge contrast between intern and employee. i am asked my opinion. i am trusted. people in the office assume i know what i am doing. and most of all, i am put to work doing actual work that is actually beneficial to the company.

i want to know how many times i will write "actual" or some form of it during this post.

i love my job. i love doing what i do, and it is only the third day. rock on.

here's to you.

2009-04-10T10:47:00.004-04:00

for the past five months, i have been searching for a job. for those past months, i have been emailing my resume out, interviewing with those big and small, rejected by way of the silent treatment. yesterday, someone finally said yes.

life is tough right now. but it's always tough. so for someone to take a chance on me, i am utterly all smiles. and i haven't been smiles lately. i have been a ball full of worry. and stress. but now, i can relax and breath. i love my industry. i love my place in it right now. i can't wait to grow.

i have tried for so long to find a position where i know i will excel. and i found one. and those months of searching have lead to me have this unimaginable hunger as an advertiser. i have had some falls along the way. but i have had some amazing shots at greatness. and i am proud of every single one because i have done them, and i have grown and been taught some very important lessons.

so here's to you, people in the big offices of the big agencies who never return emails and phone calls. here's to you, people who say i need to be hungry for it all, who say i am entitled. here's to you, people who say my book isn't exciting, and to those who say "maybe next time".

but also, here's to you, friends who said to never give up. family who prayed. people who said keep going. those who wished for the best and those who said i have talent.

the people who turned me away gave me the drive and ambition. the people closest to me gave me the determination to keep going.

chocolate shakes and burgers! yes please.

2009-04-07T09:57:00.004-04:00

i just realized that once the weather settles into something wonderful, i will be going to 'shake shack' in madison square park. just thinking about that place made me giddy with excitement, like some girl who just saw the jo bros for the first time. yes, that type of excitement.

the weather in nyc brings out the best i think in everyone. i don't know why i keep talking about the weather in all of my posts, so i apologize. but that is all for now.

i also talk about food i think too. not a glutton.

life change

2009-04-04T21:59:00.003-04:00

so, i had an internship with EuroRSCG, which is an advertising agency. i was interning as a strategic planner, and i wish i could tell you what my job was, but i still can't.

yes, the word is 'had'. through a series of events and consequences, we broke up. and i'm not mad at all. or upset. the short time i was there, i realized what i loved to do was creative, and my account service dream was just a dream.

i learned a few things, but one thing i will miss is the fridge full of DP.

on a side note, the weather is finally getting its act together. thank goodness.

brian: 1. new york: 0

2009-03-30T09:50:00.003-04:00

the first thing i was excited about when i moved to nyc was the excuse of never having to drive anywhere. i was in loooooooooooove with public transportation for so many reasons, but the two most important was i could leave the hard work to someone else, and i didn't have to worry about trains. above ground i mean.

so my internship sinfully entrusted me with an automobile. a volvo to be more specific, which was probably for the best since i have a track record worse than most normal human beings. that being said, i was told to drive around in the nation's largest city like it ain't no thang. also, this was the first time i have really driven in a long time, and the first time i have driven in nyc.

the biggest city i have ever driven through has been dallas. but i mean, i used to live there and it was seriously nothing. coming to nyc and driving, man. what a way to release some pent up frustration. i could honk my horn at anyone and anything, i could speed around the city (for the brief 2 seconds i was allowed to before i would hit a car or a pedestrian, or a red light) and i could pull over anywhere and not get in trouble. seriously, try that in dallas and see how many cops surround you in less than 5 minutes.

BUT THE MOST EXCITING PART OF MY DAY!!!!!!!! i found the only drive-thru McDonald's in the city. and i used my driving privledges to take erin, ja and myself into a little place i call heaven and experience some good old fashion food.

i don't plan on driving around the city for some time. i mean, it was probably a fluke i didn't kill anyone. i feel i am pretty indestructible individually considering what i have been through so i am not too worried about dying ... yet.

but i think i will leave the driving to someone else for a while. trust me.

leggins are not underwear.

2009-03-25T13:52:00.004-04:00

while i understand many things, some always seem to allude me. science is a good example.

but one thing i am completely perplexed on is the idea of tights. i know tights are good for warmth. and a good layering piece for women. they also come in a variety of colors and styles, so you have plenty of options.

however, tights are not pants. like, it seriously looks like you forgot an article of clothing - your pants. or skirt. but throwing on a pair of tights and walking out of your apartment is not what i call awesome.

some might say it's no different than wearing a swimsuit. and i say you are wrong. because it's expected to be worn on a beach or a pool. but you don't walk around manhattan in just a swim suit do you? i hope not.

manners, please.

2009-03-24T12:09:00.004-04:00

now, as a good ole southern boy, my mother taught me a few things. beating girls isn't a good idea. opening doors for others is always in season. and if someone writes/calls/corresponds with you, you reply back.

i know the world doesn't (sadly) revolve around me, but so far, it's done an amazing job. but what really presses my buttons is when i email people or leave a voice mail, and i get nothing. i mean, i could have shouted into a brick wall and i would have received my own voice as a response. but sending information and never hearing back is infuriating.

working in the advertising industry, i would hope and assume we would be best at communication. after all, we communicate with the world. and with blackberry on the verge of implanting itself into our brains in about 2.5 minutes, i don't understand why people can't reply to anything within a reasonable amount of time. seriously.

i am just confused as to where all of our manners have gone. some things should stay the same (stop messing with facebook...facebook) and some things should simply RIP (children who scream and cry in public). and it is my opinion that manners should stay. it frightens me when i open the door for a person (woman mostly. guys are on their own...unless it's jake gyllenhaal....i'm locking that door and throwing away the key) and they look at me like i am about to strike them down with my bag or fist and walk away like it's alright.

do people not do nice things anymore? does blair waldorf really exist? i am sure i have some emails to attend to.

first day of spring...not.

2009-03-20T12:04:00.004-04:00

so, in regards to my previous post, i was waiting for spring to slap a bitch. apparently, spring, much like rihanna (what, to soon?) lost. and it's now snowing. or was snowing when i left my apartment for work this morning.

as a firm believer in warm weather, i find this whole mother nature thing quite annoying. i mean, last night while shopping for things i do not need, i had to turn away a very impressive belt because i seriously didn't know when i would be able to wear shorts. and i think that is a travesty.

on a completely different note, i am way excited today is friday. because friends will be visiting tomorrow and i will be able to indulge in some cuddling with my bed. plus, i read this amazing article today in GQ about how to drink without consequences, and i am excited to try it out. often, i have found myself having the time of my life, only to wake up in the morning wishing i could live my life without feeling like a zombie. it's a slippery slope really.

so i will try it out. hold tight.

spring...awakening. (ha, get it?)

2009-03-19T12:03:00.004-04:00

i can tell spring is upon us. and i am way more excited than most people. growing up in warm places such as california and texas, i have grown accustomed to heat. and nice breezes. and i am used to having short winters that don't make you wish portable heaters would be invented. kinda like a bubble that you walk into and poof!! you are are all warm and snuggly. i think we should start inventing people.

so the past few days, spring has slowly shown her gorgeous face. she is fighting with winter. winter is giving up. but it's kind of an intense battle between seasons and i really can't wait for spring to just slap a bitch and call it a day. seriously. i have big plans for outfits. and i want to lay out in central park because let's face it, a tan is good for the soul.

i would say i can't wait to start a running routine, but i would be going against everything i stand for - such as fast food and sitting down on the subway even if i am going one stop.

2009-03-15T22:36:00.004-04:00

if you know me, you know i love affair with McDonalds. it's borderline unhealthy to be honest. so it makes me sad when i see this commercial, created by Arnold Worldwide, because the love i have for McDonalds and their number one, or two, or three, or if i am really hungry, a number four, seems to dwindle every time i see this commercial. and it doesn't help the situation that it seems to run all the freaking time.

2009-03-12T13:49:00.004-04:00

now that i have settled into my new job, relocated to a big city away from my family - more importantly my mother who was able to provide fresh, delicious tasting meals in minutes - and have become an "adult" as some might say, i have come to a few conclusions regarding life after college. i will only post one of them here.

i consume food in the way most pediatricians tell you not to consume. today, i have eaten: a muffin, toast, and coffee (but the coffee in a can, pretending to be good for you but is really packed with a few hundred calories and and is actually pretty terrible for you). so far, my breakfast is sorta healthy. sorta. moving on, for lunch i have eaten oreo cookies. and washed it down with a dr pepper - which will be referred to from here on out as DP).

and don't get me started on the past few days. entire cartons of mac and cheese. chocolate. donuts. mcdonalds. fritos, sans bean dip.

i think my diet is far worse than that of a 1st grader who has a nickname of chubs and wears shirts a few sizes too small. i don't know if this is to be blamed on my new occupation of being a 9-5er, but i do have issues with what i am ingesting into my body - but i clearly am doing nothing to combat this issue. only time will tell if i start breaking out in zits like a high schooler, or if i really will become your friend chubs. but i don't think i can take the latter because i already have a double chin thing, thanks to the lack of definition in my jaw line, and i don't want to add to it.

2009-03-12T11:42:00.002-04:00

this is my first blog.